One of the universal laws of giving is that " You cannot give what you don't have". This law is applicable to every area of our lives, including our Relationship/ Marriage
Some people say a good relationship involves giving without expecting something in return; I say that is true to some extent. When you give to your partner, don't expect or demandhim or her to give the same in return. He/ she is allowed to give in return in any other way deemed fit; as long as it doesn't pose any harm to your relationship/ marriage.
This law is no respecter of person and is applicable whether you're, dating, courting or actually married; male or female
Too often people are involved in relationships where one party is at the giving end and the other at the receiving end.
Often times one person gives a 110% while the other partner gives nothing or a tiny fraction in return.
Some people say a good relationship involves giving without expecting something in return; I say that is true to some extent. When you give to your partner, don't expect or demandhim or her to give the same in return. He/ she is allowed to give in return in any other way deemed fit; as long as it doesn't pose any harm to your relationship/ marriage.
There's a no feeling as bad as loving someone without being loved in return ( I trust a large number of people can relate with this). Not only is that person being treated unfairly, I consider it an act of EMOTIONAL FRAUD.
A relationship/Marriage has a greater chance of surviving when both partners love each other and reciprocate this love. A Relationship/Marriage has a greater chance of surviving when both partners give not 50-50, but 100-100.
Contrary to some school of thought, one person's love, sacrifice, or compromise is not enough for both parties in a Relationship/Marriage. A partner who gives without receiving in return will one day go dry and run out of what to give. Only one person has been able to give a 100% of himself , while we did not deserve it, without receiving same- JESUS
Any one who gives love continously without receiving might fall into any of these categories below;
Any one who gives love continously without receiving might fall into any of these categories below;
1. They have low self esteem. Even though they are treated as trash, they believe they are getting what they deserve or that is their worth
2. They are hoping that their partner would one day realize their errors and start loving them in return
3. They have a warped definition of what love ought to be
While the second point is a possibility, as there have been cases where a partner persisted and continued to show love until the other party came around or began to reciprocate. (Especially in marriage)This should be done prayerfully and you must know the difference between this and being used.
Every time, you show love to someone and you are loved in return, that persons emotional bank account is credited with you, which makes it possible to for him/her to draw at any point in time.
Using the example of a bank; you cannot walk into a bank and ask to draw money when you have not made any deposit with them. If for any reason you make any withdrawal without any form of deposit, it's either a loan or you have stolen money that's not yours. Either way you become indebted to the bank.
In the case of a loan, you will be required to pay back with interest. The same applies to a Relationship/ Marriage. When you draw or receive love without giving, your emotional bank account goes into a debit balance. Not only will you need to fill it up from its negative position to its positive position, you will also need to maintain a minimum balance on the account
Everybody wants / needs to be loved. Any relationship that is draining you more than its replenishing you is cancerous and should be avoided. You don't need a soothsayer to tell you that your love isn't being reciprocated. If ever find yourself in a situation, do what is best for you and find someone who will replenish you, each time you give.
If you think you have been giving love which is is not being reciprocated, please don't keep it bottled in. Talk to your partner about how you feel as it relates to the relationship.
If you think you have been giving love which is is not being reciprocated, please don't keep it bottled in. Talk to your partner about how you feel as it relates to the relationship.
Loving someone should not be forced or coerced. It ought to come naturally, freely and uninhibited. If you have to force your partner to show love to you. There's a problem.
For my married friends reading this, if you ever find yourself in this situation, point number two mentioned earlier is applicable. Continue to show love prayerfully, if he/she has loved you before, yes that love can be rekindled.
For my single friends, if you're dating someone who doesn't reciprocate your love, don't enter into marriage with him/her without a positive resolution.
Stay Blessed and Remember to share this with someone.
Eyitemi TheHomeBuilder
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