HOW TO BUILD: THE PROVERBS 31 WOMANS BLUE PRINT

As a sequel to my previous article "BUILD IN DEEDS" you'll remember I mentioned that building or to be a "Home Builder" requires action; deliberate, concrete & visible doing.
Now its not enough for us to know we need to build or be willing to build,we need to know "how to" build and build successfully.
A wise man once said" the best ways to achieve success is by standing on the shoulders of those who have gone ahead of us"
Home Building is no different. It comes without argument God himself is the founder of the great institution called "Marriage" and He knows the best way to build. After going through scriptures and meditating on how God expects

us to be doing this home building business, the Holy Spirit to someone, a woman who was an active Home Builder, and a successful one at that. In fact, she was so successful that an eulogy of her and her achievements were written in the Holy Book (Bible)
Yes I am talking about the Proverbs 31 woman. She has been the perfect model since time immemorial and she will continually be for many generations to come.
In this series we will be exploring how to build our homes using this exceptional woman's method as a blue print.

1. SHE BUILDS HER RELATIONSHIP WITH HER HUSBAND:
(Proverbs 31:12) " She comforts, encourages, and does him only good as long as there is life within her" (AMP)
Countless times I have heard women speak about and treat their husbands as though he doesn't matter, especially when there are children in the picture.
Of course I believe that our children are our investments and our future. Without a doubt, they are the ones to be there for us when we are all old and grey, they are the ones to continue our legacy and they are proof that we once were; thus they are very important. That being said,we forget very quickly that these children were not a product of our own singular effort. And before they ever came into existence, our husbands were.
Asides situations where we have irresponsible men who will not live up to their husbandly and fatherly responsibilities, (in such cases, I advise women to pay close attention to their children, while trusting God for a change in their husbands) your husband should be priority 1.
Just like the Proverbs 31 woman, she built her home successfully by FIRST: " building her relationship with her husband". I honestly believe that is wisdom because if there's anything I've learnt from over 5 years of marriage, is that a marriage without the support of your better half, is misery.
The Proverbs 31 woman knew that and she made " building her relationship with her husband" her first point of call.
The question then is, "how did she build that relationship?"
The scripture above (Prov 31:12) tells us exactly how.
---> Comfort Him: to comfort your husband means to soothe him, make him feel relaxed, to cheer him up. Each time you fail to evoke these emotions from your husband, you are destroying, not building. You presence and company should make your husband feel comforted/ relaxed. The same applies to the environment of your home. Keep your environment tidy, clean and welcoming, let him feel the difference between his work environment and the home front each time he arrives. If you husband cannot associate you or your home to comfort, then you're no different from the foolish woman who tears down.
--->Encourage Him: To encourage means to support him, inspire confidence in him, to promote him. In building your relationship with your husband, you need to be his No 1 and most supportive fan. Its also imbedded in your JD(job description) as a helper or help meet. You will successfully build your relationship with your husband, when you support his dreams, goals, and careers.
---> Do him Good: There are no limitations to how much good you ought to do to your husband. The long and short of this is to treat your husband right, be kind to him, pamper him, don't deprive him and most importantly as difficult as this may sound, even when he wrongs you, don't pay evil for evil or insults for insults. ( I learnt this the hard way with my own marriage) 1Peter 3:9
Other versions of Proverbs 31:12 says that " she does him good all the days of her life" not only when he's good to her, or when he deserves it, "ALL THE DAYS OF HER LIFE"
Like I mentioned earlier, building a home is no easy task, but knowing how to and what to do makes it easier.
Join me next week, as we continue to explore this series on "HOW TO BUILD : Using the Proverbs 31 woman blueprint.

Eyitemi The HomeBuilder
 
BBM:263F7ED6
 
Twitter: @homebuilders012
 
Blog: www.eyitemithehomebuilder.blogspot.com
 
Email: homebuilderssn@gmail.com

BUILD IN DEEDS

I listened to a message recently which had me re-examining what I know about (proverbs 14:1). I have read this scripture over and over again, as a matter of fact, it was the scripture that birthed "HOME BUILDERS” but not once had i seen it from the preachers approach.

The message was titled “WISE or FOOLISH "by Jannelle Bradshaw of Sovereign Grace Ministries and she made a point that struck a chord in me. She said “It’s easy for us (women) to assume that although we might not necessarily be building all the time, we are defiantly not tearing down.. We tend to think we are in between. But that is not true; the Bible says a wise woman builds and a foolish woman tears down. We are constantly (consciously or unconsciously) doing one of the 2at some point. There is no in between.

I meditated on those words and it became clearer to me. Of course there's no in between when it comes to the things of God. 

• You're either on God's side or the devils side
• You're either hot or cold, (you can’t be Luke Warm or else God will spit you out. Rev 3:15-16)
• You're either building or destroying

It was a huge eye opener for me as I began to reflect on my years as a wife and a mother and I asked myself if I had been building or tearing down. I meditated further on this scripture examining all the various versions until 2 interpretation of this scripture caught my attention.

------> NEW CENTURY VERSION (NCV)

Proverbs 14:1- " A wise woman strengthens her family but a foolish woman destroys hers by what she does"

-------->GOOD NEWS TRANSLATION (GNT)

Proverbs 14:1- " Homes are made by the wisdom of women; but are destroyed by foolishness.

The emphasis here is on the concluding part of the NCV version " by what what she does"

The word build or to build is a verb i.e an action word. According to dictionary definition, to build means to construct, put together,strenghten, to increase, mold, create. it involves a doing process; putting together one piece at a time over a certain period. The word build is an action word. It is measured , evaluated and determined based on what we do.

Not only is building an action word, it is an activity carried out one step at a time. When we say we  build as women , wives and mothers we must ensure that this is reflected via our actions on a daily bases. Buildings don't just materialize by wishing or talking them into existence, they require a conscious and applied effort. The same is applicable in our marriages and our homes.

So,what actions are you taking and by actions I mean deliberate and conscious ones to build your marriage/home?

 What steps are you taking to ensure your home is a success?

It is often said (although I cant verify that claim) that women constitute the largest percentage of church goers as we are mostly praying for our husbands, children, marriages and so on. asking God for one miracle or the other.

While prayer is good , you must never forget the scripture that says "faith without works is dead" (James 2:14-17). God is a miracle working God, not a magician. Every miracle He ever performed required the effort, doing or in this case, the building of man.

---> when he was to part the red sea, he asked Moses to strech forth his rod

---> when he turned water into wine, he asked men to fill the jars with water

---->when he fed the 5,000 man provided 5 loaves of bread and two fishes

---> when Peter the only natural man to ever walk on water broke the world record, he needed to step out into the sea for the miracle to occur

STOP WISHING & START DOING!

What aspect of your marriage/home is falling apart? its probably because you are failing to build in that area. In as much as both parties (husband & wife) are a necessary equation needed to make marriage work, your mandate and my mandate is to build our homes and we require Gods wisdom for that.

I like the way Gills Exposition of the whole Bible puts it.

 "Every wise woman buildeth her house , not only by her fruitfulness as Leah and Rachael built up the house of Israel; but by her good houswifery, prudent economy, looking well to the ways of her household, guiding the affairs of her home with discretion, keeping all things in a  good decorum and bringing up children in the fear and admonition of the Lord"

To build is no easy task, but it is clear that ther are only two kinds of women; the wise ones and the foolish ones. Its also clear that only the wise ones can successfully build a home.Our prater daily htne should be that that God should grant us thw wisdom to build and do the right things in and for our marriages/homes.

No wonder the Bible says in Proverbs 31:11

"her husband trust her completly, with her he has everything he needs" NCV

" her husband puts his confidence in her and he will never be poor" GNT

No man will completly trust or put his confidence in a foolish woman who knows nothing but how to pull down, tear and destroy.

LET'S GET BUILDING!!!

Join us next week as we talk about the actions we need to take to build successfully.....

Eyitemi The Homebuilder

BBM: 263F7ED6

Twitter: @homebuilders012

Blog: www.eyitemithehomebuilder.blogspot.com

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